The Worst Christmas Song

Andrew Sullivan —  Dec 25 2012 @ 8:53am

Patton Oswalt has one nomination:

Jonathan Coulton chooses a more conventional tune:

"Jingle Bell Rock," for me, exemplifies succumbing to your worst impulses as a songwriter. It’s one of those Christmas songs that mostly feels like it’s trying to cash in on a couple of things, one of them being the popularity of the Christmas song "Jingle Bells," which no one will deny, and the newfound popularity, at the time, of rock music. You can almost hear the discussion. They’re like, "You know what we should do? We should combine two things that America loves: ‘Jingle Bells’ and rock music." Then it’s "ka-ching" from there. 

What you end up with is a song that, first of all, most modern listeners would hear this song, and say, "Well, where is the rock, exactly?" Mostly it sounds like jingle bell jazz. I recognize rock was young, but it’s sort of the equivalent of if I decided today that I was going to do a song called "Jingle Bell Rap." [Laughs.] It would be about as good. "Jingle bell rap. Shop at the Gap." That’s half the song right there.