T-TIME

I’d already smeared my Androgel over my upper torso when I sat down to read Jerry Groopman’s New Yorker piece on hormones for “andropausal” men. I should say I’m second to no one in admiring Jerry’s integrity, smarts and seemingly boundless energy. He’s my doctor, as well, and it’s no exaggeration to say I revere him. But I can’t help feeling that the most recent wave of anti-hormonal news has something a little preachy about it. I’m talking about a general conventional wisdom among the responsible upper-middle-classes that taking meds that make you actually feel good has something illicit about it. Scratch beneath some of the somber-toned analyses of new data, and you’ll find not a little puritanism underneath. Take the fuss over a recent study showing minuscule increases in cancer and other diseases as a function of women taking lots of estrogen after menopause. In a study of over 10,000, none of the groups with an increased risk of serious side-effects even broke into double figures. (Only Newsweek gave us a little side-bar showing why it’s a storm in a C-cup.) Even Jerry concedes that we don’t really know the long-term effects of men taking testosterone in modest doses. But we do know the short-term effects. It makes you feel marvelous. In lots of men with low testosterone, the extra boost makes them feel stronger, sexier, healthier, and more mentally alert. It seems to me that even in the worst case scenario of a small increase in the likelihood of, say, prostate cancer, this is worth considering. Would you rather live till you’re 85, gradually sinking into torpor and sexual collapse or have a great time and conk out at 65? I guess for me, the choice is an obvious one. The T-thing turned my life around and I’m not giving up now. (The chances of my living till 85 are also, shall we say, slim.) But I don’t see why it’s such a crazy trade-off for others as well. The point of life is not, it seems to me, to vie with one another to be clapped out network news droolers well into our 90s. The point, from a purely health-based point of view, is to have the most productive and energized time you can in a life-span you have some control over. For centuries, people didn’t have the luxury to make these trade-offs. Now we do, and all the medical scolds are telling us to grin and bear it. Why?