“I seem to have lost my virginity again, to be known in a new way. It’s a little too exciting and sophisticated, a little too heady. I am as fragile and innocent as a ravished child. I am not ready for an affair. I should wait until I grow up, but at 43, I realize that might never happen.” – Carol Skolnick, Salon. Readers are hereby invited to send in examples of the most embarrassing, poorly written soft-porn pap from Salon they can find.