by Chris Bodenner
In a week of super-slow news, the annulment discussion is getting a rousing response from readers. One writes:
As a Catholic, I admit that I laughed when I read the first sentence of the reader's email: "I am an ordained Roman Catholic deacon in the Archdiocese of Los Angeles. " Translation: you're about to hear the official diocesean spin. A permanent deacon is to the Church what a 2nd Lieutenant is to the army: gung-ho, enormously pleased with his station, and ready to carry the official line to the gates of Hell, if necessary.
Yes, the Church insists that annulments are rare and difficult to obtain and are only granted in certain remarkable cases. But the laity knows the truth: that 9 times out of 10 the Church will wave a magic wand and make your marriage disappear. You can parse the regulations all you want, but look: there's a loophole for just about everybody. And everybody knows it.
Another writes:
What this Catholic deacon appears to be doing is trying to pin down the precise meaning of impossibly vague terms by fleshing them out…with impossibly vague terms. The whole thing is simple. God said, "No divorce." Man said, "But we WANT divorce!" The Church went with Man instead of God. This sort of thing happens all the time. God said to Joseph Smith, "Plural marriage is necessary for exaltation!" The U.S. government said, "No get rid of plural marriage, no statehood." The Utahns said, "We want statehood!" The LDS Church went with the Utahns instead of God. Both churches have published reams of spin to justify these corruptions, but really, what's so hard to understand? Sometimes bullshit is just bullshit.
Another:
I am certainly no expert on the particulars of Catholic law, but I would like to make a few points in the discussion about annulments. All Catholic couple are required to go through pre-cana prior to their wedding. My husband and I went to a seminar that lasted 2 full days in addition to individual counseling with our priest. At the seminar they impressed on us the seriousness of sacramental marriage, and the fact that it shouldn't be entered into quickly (hence a waiting period required by most churches) or lightly. (I was very surprised to hear the priest say that couples absolutely should not get married just because they were pregnant.) So, I think they try, both through individual counseling and through education.
My pre-cana class covered annulments a little bit, enough that I can take issue with another point. Contrary to what your reader writes, an annulment does not mean a marriage "never happened," or that the children are bastards. It means that, for whatever reason, the marriage was not a valid covenant with God. In order to get an annulment, you have to explain why you weren't in a position to enter a convenant with God at the time of marriage. The reasons basically come down to a) You were tricked in some way by the other party, or b) You couldn't really understand the implications of a covenant due to some impediment within you (most likely immaturity, but maybe addiction or mental illness, for example)
This might all seem very silly, but in my experience, priests take it very much to heart. They do try to make getting married relatively inconvenient, encourage introspection, and provide education about the sacrament. If people are willing to say they were too stupid to understand what a covenant with God means, I fail to see how it serves the tradition of the Catholic Church not to practice compassion and forgiveness, two pillars of Catholicism which undergird sacraments in their own right.
Another:
Regarding the annulments issue, I believe most, if not all, American dioceses require prospective brides and grooms to go through counseling and take the PREP Marriage Test. I married almost 30 years ago in the RC Church, went through the counseling and took an early version of PREP as well as Pre-Cana (the old program). The "impediments" were made clear then, both in face-to-face counseling and through the test and its results. Of course, couples can and do lie for so many reasons.
The Dish 