With freedom comes responsibility – to parents:
Being gay has downsides: social bias, discrimination and homophobia, to name but three. But one blessing gay people have had was not having to endure pushy moms (and some dads) pestering them about when they are going to settle down and marry. With same-sex marriage now legal in New York, some gay sons and daughters are starting to feel the same heat from parents as do their straight siblings.
The reader who sent us the link shares his own story:
In 1997, before we were married, my then-boyfriend and I were together for over a year, living together and planning to spend the rest of our lives together. We assumed our family understood that. We weren't planning on ceremonies or legal partnerships. We were against those "trappings."
Then at a Thanksgiving gathering I asked my brother if my nephew could call my husband "uncle" (in a gesture to those "trappings" I guess). He asked, "What is he to you?", and I responded, "We plan to spend our lives together." Later that evening my sister-in-law slapped me playfully on the shoulder and asked "Why didn't you tell us you were married!?"
We realized then and there that our family and friends needed something more than our word. So we had a wonderful, family- and friend-filled commitment celebration six months later. Then a legal wedding. Now, in spite of our original intentions, we are pretty much a typical middle-class family with two kids, jobs and a house. Not only do we expect to spend our lives together, but everyone else does too (for good or bad I guess ;)
The Dish 