Researchers at the Chinese University of Hong Kong surveyed 71 Chinese mothers and 144 American mothers of European and African descent, as well as their 13-year-old children, to parse parenting styles:
The novel finding is that Chinese mothers more often than the Americans said their self-worth was tied to the success of their children, agreeing with statements like “When my daughter fails, I feel badly about myself”. Basing their self-worth on their children’s success accounted for 25 per cent of the between-country variance in mothers’ psychological control of their children. The researchers speculated other relevant factors could be: the Chinese notion of guan – according to which parents must dedicate themselves to their offspring, with their children’s success in the eyes of society taken as a sign of good parenting; and the Chinese focus on a “face” culture – the idea that one’s sense of worth is measured by the respect gained from others.
The limitations of the study:
The study doesn’t prove that basing their own self worth in their children’s success causes Chinese mothers to exert greater psychological control over their children. It’s possible the causal direction runs the other way, or both ways. The study is also limited in only focusing on psychological control while neglecting behavioural control.
The Dish 