A reader emails using “not my real name, of course”:
I was thankful to see you mention the recent “This American Life” episode on non-offending pedophiles. I’m a long-time Dish reader. I’m also a pedophile. And like many others who are attracted to children, I have never acted on my attractions, and am committed to never doing so.
I’d also like to make you aware of an online resource for pedophiles who are committed to abstaining from sexual contact with minors: Virtuous Pedophiles. We provide information and a list of resources, and an online support group for those who believe that sexual contact with children is always wrong. Thanks for raising awareness of the issue.
The intro message from Virtuous Pedophiles sums up the predicament:
We do not choose to be attracted to children, and we cannot make that attraction go away.
But we can resist the temptation to abuse children sexually, and many of us present no danger to children whatsoever. Yet we are despised for having a sexual attraction that we did not choose, cannot change, and successfully resist. This hatred has its consequences; many of us suffer from depression and sometimes even commit suicide. Paradoxically, the hatred actually increases the risk of child sexual abuse by making us afraid to admit our condition to others, thus discouraging us from seeking treatment. More of us could lead productive, happy, law-abiding lives if we could open up to people who would treat us not as monsters but as human beings with an unfortunate burden to bear.
Another reader adds:
I have provided psychiatric care for similar men. Supporting pedophiles in not acting on their attraction helps these men and helps prevent victimization of children. In Sweden, there is a helpline called PrevenTell, which provides phone counseling and referrals for help for pedophiles to not act on their attraction. It is a program of the Karolinska University Hospital in Stockholm, under the leadership of sexologist Katarina Görts Öberg. But even in Sweden, funding for such programs is a challenge.
Perhaps if we had more funding and support for non-practicing pedophiles at a young age, when they are most treatable, not as many of them would enter, say, the priesthood and become non-non-practicing.
The Dish 