Category: The Dish

The cover-story in today’s NYT magazine is a vivid and fascinating encounter with the first generation of gay men who actually have the chance to marry in the same way and at the same time as their heterosexual peers. The silly photo-illustrations underline a very simple point: there is something very natural about wanting to turn one’s sexual and emotional attraction to another human being into a lasting bond. Every connection is unique, and defies easy generalization, but the themes are universal: securing love, seeking stable companionship, integrating into one’s own family, building a home and a future with another person. The NYT’s wedding section has an example of exactly such a moment:

“It was pretty simple,” Mr. Self said. “We were both at that point in life when we had dated a lot of people and were looking for a partner to be able to build a life with and not just date casually.” The couple discussed their future together.

“Did we want to have a family? Did we want to stay in New York? What did we want to do with our careers? How did we feel about monogamy?” Mr. Self recalled of their questions to each other. “And it became very clear to us that we were on the same page.” After eight months they moved in together in Brooklyn Heights…

Mr. Fraley said they wanted to formalize their union before considering having children. “We have very traditional New York City family values,” Mr. Fraley said.

It’s important to remember when you read of such self-evidently constructive relationships that they are banned in 40 states, and that the president of the United States believes that they are destructive of family life. In fact, one political party is now dedicated to demonizing these people and denying them basic legal protections and validity. Targeting these couples as examples of moral degeneracy is given legitimacy by the Pope himself. And preventing them from having civil equality is now a core plank of the Republican party. Ask yourself: are these couples in any way hurting anyone? How can they ever be understood as threat to anyone else’s relationship or marriage or family? It makes no sense at all.

All one can say is that at some point in the future, sane people of all political persuasions will see this current Republican and Catholic and Fundamentalist orthodoxy as the mean-spirited madness it is. Meanwhile, those of us building these families will carry on. It’s encouraging to see so many unintimidated by the campaign of hatred and obloquy directed toward them. Rock on, guys. And don’t let the haters get you down.

"Barack Obama has boycotted Fox News for the past two years. Obama’s boycott ended today, as he was interviewed by Chris Wallace. The result suggests that Obama had nothing to fear from the ostensibly hostile crowd at Fox. Obama showed, once again, that he is a rare political talent. In contrast with his uncharacteristically poor performance in the Pennsylvania debate, Obama handled questions about Wright, Ayers, flag lapel pins–all the hot button topics he would rather avoid–deftly. Rather than showing resentment at being asked about such things, Obama acknowledged that voters want to know who he is, and that these topics are therefore fair game. He skillfully deflected questions on these as well as more substantive issues…

In my opinion, given that Obama has essentially zero record of working with Republicans, that was extremely well done. He makes you want to believe him.

I’ve said that I think John McCain is the early favorite to beat either Obama or Hillary Clinton, but Obama’s performance today was a reminder of how formidable he will be in the fall, assuming that he gets the nomination–and that’s apart from the fact that he is the greatest money-machine in the history of American politics," – John Hinderaker, Powerline. The transcript of Obama’s Fox News Sunday interview can be read here.

One of the most striking things I discovered about Obama last year was how many conservatives and Republicans who have encountered or met or engaged him over the years think highly of him. When the partisan right tries to swift-boat him with any number of polarizing clips, smears and half-truths, his best bet is to counter them directly, in the lion’s den. He should do more of these interviews. He should go on O’Reilly and Hannity. His ability to talk to and engage those on the other side of the aisle is real. It’s an asset he shouldn’t hide.

Wouldn’t it be great if we had an election in which McCain was able and willing to talk to liberals and Democrats and Obama were often engaging conservatives and Republicans? The pressure is against such interactions, but the country would be much better off for them.

Sean McManus has a more considered article on atheism and atheist churches:

…some atheists are taking seriously the idea that atheism needs to stand for things, like evolution and ethics, not just against things, like God. The most successful movements in history, after all—Christianity, Islam, Hinduism, etc.—all have creeds, cathedrals, schools, hierarchies, rituals, money, clerics, and some version of a heavenly afterlife. Churches fill needs, goes the argument—they inculcate ethics, give meaning, build communities. “Science and reason are important,” says Greg Epstein, the humanist chaplain of Harvard University. “But science and reason won’t visit you in the hospital.”

Many atheist sects are experimenting with building new, human-centered quasi-religious organizations, much like Ethical Culture. They aim to remove God from the church, while leaving the church, at least large parts of it, standing. But this impulse is fueling a growing schism among atheists. Many of them see churches as part of the problem. They want to throw out the baby and the bathwater—or at least they don’t see the need for the bathwater once the baby is gone.

Amy Knight reviews Boris Nemtsov and Vladimir Milov’s supressed report on Putin’s administration:

As Nemtsov and Milov rightly stress, their country has "a level of corruption completely unprecedented in all of Russia’s history." Indeed, the nongovernmental organization Transparency International ranked Russia in 143rd place (with first place being the least corrupt) in its 2007 worldwide country rating of degrees of corruption. Of course, the authors say, there was plenty of corruption under Yeltsin as well. But today the sums are much larger, measured in billions of dollars, and corrupt officials, who occupy high-level government positions, are protected from public exposure by the Kremlin’s control of the law enforcement agencies and the mass media.

In The Know: How Can We Make The War In Iraq More Eco-Friendly?

Richelieu thinks Republicans should give Clinton a prize.

A few paragraphs from Michael Davitt Bell’s 1996 article recounting his experiences with cancer and mortality:

I doubt that I can account fully for the level of happiness, even euphoria, I’ve now reached, three years later and in the face of much worse news. But some of it comes, I’m sure, from the fact that since the cancer’s appearance in my lung in the summer of 1994 revealed that the original treatment hadn’t eliminated the disease, and thus the statistical odds of my surviving were close to nil, I have determined to be open and honest with other people about my disease and my prognosis. I think this has also allowed me to be open and honest with myself.

My relationships with friends and family — above all with my two daughters, now in their twenties, whose mother and I divorced when they were small — have thus taken on an emotional openness and intensity almost inconceivable for someone who, like me, grew up in an upper-middle-class WASP family in the Midwest, a family in which the word "love" was never spoken or heard except, perhaps, to express admiration for an object or article of clothing ("I just love the way that sweater looks on you!"). So I find I’m not overcome with remorse or anger, or with terror of the fate awaiting me; instead I’m cherishing each moment, each mundane experience I have left. This is, for me, a magic time.

I felt the same urgency and magic in the years immediately after being infected with HIV. I fully expected to be dead by now. The news did transform my life, and my view of the world, and my human relationships, and my faith in ways I am still grappling with. It forced me to understand that I am not in control of my own existence, and that humility before what we cannot know, along with love for those we do not easily love, is the important thing. I didn’t lose faith; but it changed in its tone and nature. It became deeper and yet less certain. That is partly how I came to relinquish the attraction of fundamentalism. Because in the face of the last things, its brittleness is what stands out.

As the immediate threat of mortality recedes, you return of course to the rhythms of forgetfulness and shallowness and trivia. Humankind cannot bear very much reality. But you never quite forget "the infirm glory of the positive hour." I’m glad that I wrote it all down before it receded from memory.

A musical – just for Mark Steyn. How he will love it so.

A snapping turtle?