“A generation ago, the big capitalists, who have no morals, as we know, decided to make use of the religious right in their class war against the middle class and against the regulations that were protecting those whom they considered to be their rightful prey-workers and consumers.” – Jane Smiley, from the classic Slate piece.
MALKIN AWARD NOMINEE II: “The party of Lincoln and Liberty was transmogrified into the party of hairy-backed swamp developers and corporate shills, faith-based economists, fundamentalist bullies with Bibles, Christians of convenience, freelance racists, misanthropic frat boys, shrieking midgets of AM radio, tax cheats, nihilists in golf pants, brownshirts in pinstripes, sweatshop tycoons, hacks, fakirs, aggressive dorks, Lamborghini libertarians, people who believe Neil Armstrong’s moonwalk was filmed in Roswell, New Mexico, little honkers out to diminish the rest of us, Newt’s evil spawn and their Etch-A-Sketch president, a dull and rigid man suspicious of the free flow of information and of secular institutions, whose philosophy is a jumble of badly sutured body parts trying to walk.” – Garrison Keillor, In These Times. Some occasional glimpses of originality, but mainly that peculiarly Malkinesque combo of hysterical and exhausted.
MALKIN AWARD NOMINEE III: “Look, I’m sure that the aforementioned Kerry cabal has a lot to say regarding …
• Buying a Bentley,
• Conducting an orgy,
• The preeminent natural herb for curbing the side effects of herpes,
• How to pick out the right stripper and midget for a ménage à trois,
• Where to get nice leather pants,
• Which silicone company produces the best butt implants,
• Where to buy Viagra by volume,
• How to drink alcohol like Otis on Mayberry RFD,
• How to juggle a wife and girlfriend(s),
• How to mousse one’s hair to stand up like Elsa Lancaster’s in The
Bride of Frankenstein,
• Where to get a tattoo on your ass,
• Where to have a tattoo removed from your ass,
• Where to buy a purple velvet spandex cat suit, a good cravat, and
felt booties,
• How to redistribute someone else’s wealth to pimps, whores and welfare brats,
• How to rid one’s nation of Judeo-Christian ethics and …
• How to make a mock-u-mentary film filled with complete crap about a
standing war-time president.” – Doug Giles, Townhall.com.
MALKIN AWARD NOMINEE IV: “Arrogant to the core, the elitist ketchup-digger revealed his true feelings toward George Bush – and by extension, all of us clodhopping carp-chompers in the Red States — with one infamous slip of the tongue.” – Ron Marr, CNS News.com. Actually, Marr makes it out of Malkin-land, with the phrase “clodhopping carp-chompers.” That’s original. If odd.
MALKIN AWARD NOMINEE V: “She’s not afraid to expose hypocritical environmentalists, needle pork-loving politicians or criticize the MTV generation’s morally deprived icons.” – Michelle Malkin, from her own biography.
MALKIN AWARD NOMINEE VI: A cartoon.
The Dish 