Typical dinner.. Everyone on their iPhones/iPad pic.twitter.com/VDB6RgIDQK
— nikki. (@nicoole_rebecca) May 30, 2013
danah boyd (who for some reason prefers her name lowercased) is the author of It’s Complicated: The Social Lives of Networked Teen. Denise Tanton appreciates that the book “helps adults get past the very confusing and often frightening stories we see often see about bullying, online sexual predators and teen addiction to the internet to understand what’s really happening with kids online”:
Our kids are over-scheduled. We don’t believe it’s safe for them to ride their bikes around their neighborhoods. Malls and diners often have restrictions in place that prevent teens from gathering in public spaces. Sometimes the only place our kids can hang out with their friends IS on social media. And, when they are with their friends, they aren’t using social media to escape — they’re using their using the smart phones to connect with other friends, take photos and otherwise document their in-real-life experience, (which is not necessarily the way adults use their smart phones when they’re out and about), an example danah mentions in the introduction her her book, from a high school football game:
They whipped out their phones to take photos of the Homecoming Court, and many were texting frantically while trying to find one another in the crowd. Once they connected, the texting often stopped…. And even though many teens are frequent texters, the teens were not directing most of their attention to their devices. When they did look at their phones, they were often sharing the screen with the person sitting next to them, reading or viewing something together.
The parents in the stands were paying much more attention to their devices. They were even more universally equipped with smartphones than their children and those devices dominated their focus.
Emily Bazelon asked the author about how adults should interact with kids on social media. Her response:
I tell parents to build a network for your child—the older cousin, the cool aunt, the awesome coach. That way, when they need advice, you’re not the only person they have to turn to. You should really encourage those other relationships, and they’ll form on technology, on social media or via texting. As a parent, there are times your kid won’t want to talk to you. So the more you’ve thought through how they have a support network that’s not just you, the better off they’ll be when they hit any bump. And increasingly, the way that happens is online. As a parent, you can also reach out to other kids in your friend networks, so you’re an adult those kids can turn to.
