UPDIKE ON A DOG’S DEATH

A reader sent in this wonderful little poem, in honor of the late beagle, Euclid. I hope Updike won’t sue me for reprinting it. You can buy his collected poems here. Here’s the late beagle:

Euclid

And here’s the gem:

She must have been kicked unseen or brushed by a car.
Too young to know much, she was beginning to learn
To use the newspapers spread on the kitchen floor
And to win, wetting there, the words, “Good dog!

Good dog!”

We thought her shy malaise was a shot reaction.
The autopsy disclosed a rupture in her liver.
As we teased her with play, blood was filling her skin
And her heart was learning to lie down forever.

Monday morning, as the children were noisily fed
And sent to school, she crawled beneath the youngest’s bed.
We found her twisted and limp but still alive.
In the car to the vet’s, on my lap, she tried

To bite my hand and died. I stroked her warm fur
And my wife called in a voice imperious with tears.
Though surrounded by love that would have upheld her,
Nevertheless she sank and, stiffening, disappeared.

Back home, we found that in the night her frame,
Drawing near to dissolution, had endured the shame
Of diarrhoea and had dragged across the floor
To a newspaper carelessly left there. Good dog.

KERRY FINDS HIS VOICE

I liked this tack:

“So I’ll be straight with you: things are getting worse. More than a thousand Americans have been killed. Instability is rising. Violence is spreading. Extremism is growing. There are now havens for terrorists that weren’t there before. And the Pentagon has even admitted that entire regions of Iraq are now controlled by insurgents and terrorists. The situation is serious – and we need a president who will set a new direction and be straight with the American people.”

What I like about it is not necessarily Kerry’s prescription. I don’t think he’s likely to resolve this any more effectively than Bush will. Most of the damage has already been done. What I like is Kerry’s challenging the Bush administration’s propensity to avoid facts, deny reality, and slime opponents as a campaign strategy. We need a debate on Iraq. We need a real thrashing out of what has gone wrong and how to put it right. We need to hold this administration accountable for its errors and arrogance and pig-headedness. Why has no one been held accountable for the WMD intelligence fiasco? Why has the Abu Ghraib shame been fobbed off onto underlings, when real responsibility for the chaos that allowed it to happen belongs in the Oval Office? What gets me about Bush is his utter refusal to take responsibility for the consequences of his own decisions. That goes for Iraq and the way in which he has squandered our fiscal future. The left doesn’t really get this because they were never that keen on the war in the first place and they do not get hot and bothered about government spending. And much of the right just echoes the party line. At least Kerry is finally asking the right questions. Someone has to.

BLAIR’S AUTHORITARIANISM: I’ll never really get America’s gun culture. Like most immigrants, I find the whole NRA subculture frightening when it isn’t funny. But I sure do respect the fundamental notion that, as a general rule, the government shouldn’t be telling people what they can and cannot own, and what they can and cannot do in their spare time. So I’m no big anti-gun person either. And when you look at Britain, you realize that the NRA isn’t the worst thing in the world. Tony Blair’s latest attack on domestic liberty is his government’s decision to ban any fox-hunting. Fox hunting is an absurd, cruel and comic activity of rural folk that nonetheless has every right to exist. What’s worse: the cops are going to ridiculous lengths to enforce the ban. The Daily Telegraph reports:

“Chief constables intend to site CCTV cameras on hedgerows, fences and trees along known hunting routes to enable them to photograph hunt members who break the law after hunting with hounds is outlawed. The controversial measure was agreed at a secret meeting between David Blunkett and the chief constables of England and Wales after the hunting ban was announced last week. Police chiefs warned the Home Secretary that enforcing the ban would cost in excess of $30 million and divert resources from front-line policing.”

Mark Steyn has great fun with this:

In Britain, Soho’s views on hunting should be no more relevant than Somerset’s opinion of gay leather bars. But they are. And those Left-wing columnists who go on about the “climate of fear” in Bush’s America ought to remember that, even in their wildest power-crazed dreams, Bush and John Ashcroft will never be able to issue a national ban on centuries-old traditions merely because they offend metropolitan taste.

Well, Bush and Ashcroft can try and foist a national ban on gay marriage; but the deeper point is that puritanism knows no politics. The desire to control other people’s lives is a universal on both right and left. And universally deplorable.

BORN-AGAIN DIVORCE

A new survey finds that born-again Christians are just as likely to get divorced as everyone else; and, in some instances, seem to have a higher rate of divorce than others. Jesus, of course, was explicit in his condemnation of divorce (unlike homosexuality). A large majority of born-again Christians disagree. Just don’t call them cafeteria Christians. They have their focus on the real threat to marriage: those who have always been barred from marrying.

KERRY ON MEDICARE: Worse than Bush, I’d say. If that were possible. Josh Claybourn despairs.

NOW, THE PILL: The increasing popularity of laws that allow doctors and pharmacists to opt out of certain practices or even certain kinds of patient is a worrying trend. It was designed in part by the religious right to prevent gay people from having access to good medical care, and also to protect doctors from being forced to perform abortions. Now, its effects are being extended to the birth control pill, which some believe can be a form of abortion. The slow and fitful attempt of the far right to control others’ sex lives continues. If you approve, vote Republican.

BLOGGER BLOCK

So I’m trying to write an … essay. I used to be able to. But this time, it’s like shaving by pulling one chin-hair out at a time. What has happened to me? Maybe blogging is like a constant diet of fast-food. The idea of making a real meal gets to seem an insuperable, Sysyphean, Julia Childean, get-the-Sunnis-on-board task. And the distractions! Only 503 more emails to read! And only 435 of them have “Satan for Bush” or ‘Fuck You, Andrew” in the cover-line. Did Derbyshire fart again? Someone just sent me a piece about anti-Semitism in Sweden. And that’s not even counting trying to create a forged document on MicrosoftWord. Take that, Dan! At this rate, I’ll be scanning Bigmuscle.com for the rest of the day, if only to get away from bunnies playing sharks. M u s t f o c u s on essay. Peter will fire me. I’m already a week late. Maybe I’ll go the gym after a quick latte. I’ll be thinking more clearly then. Oh, and by the way …

ANTI-SEMITISM WATCH: It’s pretty grim in Sweden.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

From an interview by David Talbot with Kitty Kelley:

[Talbot:] What do you think W will do if he loses in November? Will he happily go back to baseball?
[Kelley:] No. You know something that I have found out from this family after four years – he doesn’t plan to lose. They know how to win – no matter what.
[DT:] What does that mean?
[KK:] That means these people can put the Sopranos to shame.
[DT:] Does that mean vote stealing?
[KK:] That’s a bit overt. But nothing will stand in the way of these people winning. Nothing. You start out looking at the Bush family like it’s The Donna Reed Show and then you see it’s The Sopranos.

I just hope the Bushes are as tough with Osama as they are with Kerry, that’s all.

THE FLIP-FLOPPING NANNY

Saletan on Bush. Bush is for big government except when he’s against it; he’s for restraining spending, except when he’s boosting it; he’s for rooting out insurgents in Iraq, until he favors a more “sensitive” strategy; he’s for free trade, except when he’s against it; he’s against stem cell research, except when he’s bragging about it; he’s pro states rights, unless they do things he disapproves of; he’s in favor of responsibility, except when it comes to the budget; he’s pro-U.N., except when he’s against it; he’s for church-state separation, except when it comes to federal funding. Any decent opponent would make mincemeat of Bush’s wavering, straddling and inconsistent policy pronouncements. But Kerry is useless. And if he’s this useless as a candidate, how good would he be as a president?

GONE TO BEAGLE HEAVEN

A couple of years ago, longtime readers may recall, I found a little stray beagle on Euclid street in D.C. She was in terrible shape, malnourished, disease-ridden, and obviously abused. I couldn’t leave her there, nursed her halfway back to health and found her some wonderful parents, a gay couple who were friends of mine. After a hefty amount of vet bills, she thrived. And this morning I got this email:

I just wanted to let you know that Euclid left us about two months ago. (Sorry for the delay in letting you know, but it’s still really hard to face this.)
She seemed to be taken rather suddenly by pancreatic cancer. Up until the Wednesday evening, she was her usual self. In the middle of the night, after being let out twice, she started throwing up in bed. On Thursday Ron took her to the vet. Things were looking bad enough for her that we brought her home Thursday night.
We were able to spend a final night sitting up with her. I called my parents (they thought of her as their “grand dog”) who came over at 5:00am to spend some time with her, because she was suffering so much that we wanted to get her to the vet’s when the office opened.
We got there shortly after the office opened, but before the vet got in. While Ron was signing the papers to have her put down, Euclid passed away naturally, on her own.
Needless to say, Euclid’s passing still leaves a considerable hole in our lives. However, we retain many wonderful memories of her and the joy she brought to us. And we’ll always be grateful to you for bringing us into her life.
I am sorry that you never got to see the happy, confident dog that she became. (Although she still kept traces of your influence. If the Sunday paper was left on the floor and there was a Maureen Dowd piece, she’d piddle all over it.)

Beagles, I tell you. Minds of their own. May she chew for ever in peace.